Oh my goodness!
Where does the time go?
It's been 5 months since I visited my blog, and bless it, it is still here patiently awaiting my return!
Well what have I been doing all this time?.....
Getting fatter
Going on a low carb diet
losing 10lb in 3 weeks
still working at hospital
trying to cut down on my drinking
getting a new tattoo on my foot
blacked out in bathroom (not pissed)
getting 2 black eyes from blacking out
taking him indoors on a weeks holiday to Spain for his 50th
losing my mind cos he was off on the sick for 4 months
getting stronger anti-depressants from doc
slowly regaining mind when him indoors went back to work
staying on the roller coaster that is my relationship with him indoors
not having the guts to leave him
constantly hoping we will be happy one day
realising my children are lazy and selfish
becoming a great auntie
getting a great virtual farm together on Farm Town (don't ask!)
having lots of blood tests for lots of things
found out I am 'normal'
realised I am a hypochondriac!
Saturday, 15 August 2009
Tuesday, 17 March 2009
I am still about, just being quiet!
Life is still the same but a bit duller!
Him indoors want to be in bed by 7pm every night to watch the soaps, the boys are eating me into bankruptcy, work is still ok.
I am convinced that this will be the year I manage to be strong enough to break free from him indoors.
I dont like him anymore, I definately dont love him, I just cant afford to keep a roof over our heads without him. I am seriously considering a cardboard box lol!
I keep hoping he will leave us, but he seems to be digging his heels in, and insists he wants us to move out! Cheeky, alcoholic little twat!
I am going to ask at work tomorrow about the accommodation there, fingers crossed they will have something cheap enough and big enough for the 3 of us.
The only thing is with the downturn in the market, I dont think we have made anything out of the house, so do I make him sell up so he has got the up heaval as well as I lived here before he did, or is that petty and should I just let him carry on living here while we slum it? We have a joint mortgage that is on interest only so we havent actually paid anything off the capital.
He has now got over £7k in premium bonds which he never had when he moved in, he has never been so well off or so well looked after. He has now gone off on the sick with painful knees but managed to walk all the way to the pub and back today to get pissed. Happy mothers day to me x
Life is still the same but a bit duller!
Him indoors want to be in bed by 7pm every night to watch the soaps, the boys are eating me into bankruptcy, work is still ok.
I am convinced that this will be the year I manage to be strong enough to break free from him indoors.
I dont like him anymore, I definately dont love him, I just cant afford to keep a roof over our heads without him. I am seriously considering a cardboard box lol!
I keep hoping he will leave us, but he seems to be digging his heels in, and insists he wants us to move out! Cheeky, alcoholic little twat!
I am going to ask at work tomorrow about the accommodation there, fingers crossed they will have something cheap enough and big enough for the 3 of us.
The only thing is with the downturn in the market, I dont think we have made anything out of the house, so do I make him sell up so he has got the up heaval as well as I lived here before he did, or is that petty and should I just let him carry on living here while we slum it? We have a joint mortgage that is on interest only so we havent actually paid anything off the capital.
He has now got over £7k in premium bonds which he never had when he moved in, he has never been so well off or so well looked after. He has now gone off on the sick with painful knees but managed to walk all the way to the pub and back today to get pissed. Happy mothers day to me x
Tuesday, 3 February 2009
Where have all the bloggers gone?
I was just having a little look a my blog, and in particular at the bloggers I name on it as people who keep me amused, so how come out of the 4 people I enjoyed reading, 2 of them have closed down their blog!
I suppose I had best go find some new buddies!
I suppose I had best go find some new buddies!
Neighbours from Hell?
Why do people have to be so petty?
I know we piss our neighbours off as we have had a few DIY projects to do over the last 4 years, and even though we don't start til 9am at the earliest, and we are usually in bed by 9pm every night at the latest, they still constantly compain!
Now to tell you all the ins and outs of our hate/hate relationship would take the best part of a week, so I wont bore you, but where is the logic in parking your car 10 foot away from your own gate, just to try and make it awkward for us to park outside our house!
The tosser even got up early this morning after him indoors went off to work and moved his car up towards our gate and left it there ALL day, I don't let them see I am bothered but him indoors (being a man), is foaming at the mouth. Why can't he see that by reacting to the situation, then the tosser next door is winning.
Well maybe not winning exactly, as him indoors has just found a concrete window sill that needs knocking out tonight. Shame that.
I know we piss our neighbours off as we have had a few DIY projects to do over the last 4 years, and even though we don't start til 9am at the earliest, and we are usually in bed by 9pm every night at the latest, they still constantly compain!
Now to tell you all the ins and outs of our hate/hate relationship would take the best part of a week, so I wont bore you, but where is the logic in parking your car 10 foot away from your own gate, just to try and make it awkward for us to park outside our house!
The tosser even got up early this morning after him indoors went off to work and moved his car up towards our gate and left it there ALL day, I don't let them see I am bothered but him indoors (being a man), is foaming at the mouth. Why can't he see that by reacting to the situation, then the tosser next door is winning.
Well maybe not winning exactly, as him indoors has just found a concrete window sill that needs knocking out tonight. Shame that.
Monday, 2 February 2009
Grown up?
And so life goes on, and things do not change much, except, I feel calmer.
I sort of feel like I have arrived. I often get restless and feel like I should be doing stuff, but all of a sudden nothing seems to have that urgency.
I don't want to die of boredom but it really feels good, not rushing to get ready to go out and get lashed up on a Saturday. I am quite content with a takeaway and a dvd in bed.
Does this mean I am old? Nah, just content!
Now before you write me off as dull, please be assured this phase cannot last too long, in fact I will give it 2 weeks max!
Work is still really good, and I have been chosen to chaperone the surgeon in his spinal assessment clinics on a wednesday evening, so feel quite pleased as I have to be all responsible and lock up the department at the end!
I still have not lost any weight and so I failed my mission when I promised myself not to be fat at 40!
oh well there is always 50! or 60!
I sort of feel like I have arrived. I often get restless and feel like I should be doing stuff, but all of a sudden nothing seems to have that urgency.
I don't want to die of boredom but it really feels good, not rushing to get ready to go out and get lashed up on a Saturday. I am quite content with a takeaway and a dvd in bed.
Does this mean I am old? Nah, just content!
Now before you write me off as dull, please be assured this phase cannot last too long, in fact I will give it 2 weeks max!
Work is still really good, and I have been chosen to chaperone the surgeon in his spinal assessment clinics on a wednesday evening, so feel quite pleased as I have to be all responsible and lock up the department at the end!
I still have not lost any weight and so I failed my mission when I promised myself not to be fat at 40!
oh well there is always 50! or 60!
Wednesday, 28 January 2009
I Survived!
Hey I actually LIKE being 40!
I still feel like 16 years old and act like a 10 year old, so all is cool!
My birthday was perfect, great sex, good food, great friends, emotion, drama, tantrums, pressies, lots of money and several arguments!
So all in all a good result!
It certainly was a birthday to remember! My 86 year old grandad upset me and made me cry so that turned into a big row, involving mad aunt.
Then him indoors decided that as it was my birthday he would start smoking again after 3 month! He knows I hate it but it was almost like he was resentful that I was centre of attention, but I may be wrong!
We went for a meal with good friends and the meal was super. He then decides to puff his way to the pub and I felt the anger rising, ok , I know I was wrong but I was so gutted that he had chosen my special day to start smoking again, that I had an argument in the pub with him and he stormed off. He didnt return home til 2.35am. Just like the good old days!
We was friends again on the Saturday, and Sunday, we even went out for lunch on Sunday. Monday night he was a bit moody, then last n ight it all kicked off again! I am not sure why, but he seems to have a bee in his bonnett about money, even though he is loaded!
I cant worry about it all as he made me ill last time with his bull-shit and I am still on strong medication, so I intend to rise above it and let him keep his nastiness to himself.
I still feel like 16 years old and act like a 10 year old, so all is cool!
My birthday was perfect, great sex, good food, great friends, emotion, drama, tantrums, pressies, lots of money and several arguments!
So all in all a good result!
It certainly was a birthday to remember! My 86 year old grandad upset me and made me cry so that turned into a big row, involving mad aunt.
Then him indoors decided that as it was my birthday he would start smoking again after 3 month! He knows I hate it but it was almost like he was resentful that I was centre of attention, but I may be wrong!
We went for a meal with good friends and the meal was super. He then decides to puff his way to the pub and I felt the anger rising, ok , I know I was wrong but I was so gutted that he had chosen my special day to start smoking again, that I had an argument in the pub with him and he stormed off. He didnt return home til 2.35am. Just like the good old days!
We was friends again on the Saturday, and Sunday, we even went out for lunch on Sunday. Monday night he was a bit moody, then last n ight it all kicked off again! I am not sure why, but he seems to have a bee in his bonnett about money, even though he is loaded!
I cant worry about it all as he made me ill last time with his bull-shit and I am still on strong medication, so I intend to rise above it and let him keep his nastiness to himself.
Tuesday, 20 January 2009
Naughty forty??
Oh bugger, I only have 2 whole days left of being in my '30's'
Does it hurt as much as I am dreading, or do only old people think I am crazy?
I haven't got a clue how to spend my birthday celebrations, it is a case of not wanting to be disappointed so I have not organised anything!
Any last minute ideas???
Does it hurt as much as I am dreading, or do only old people think I am crazy?
I haven't got a clue how to spend my birthday celebrations, it is a case of not wanting to be disappointed so I have not organised anything!
Any last minute ideas???
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