Better Than Corrie?

I have had a strange few things happen since I was last here.
On Monday we all trotted off to Bob's funeral. It was a nice dignified event and I cried so much that my eyes were still bloodshot and puffy 3 days later!

At the wake which was held at the bowls club, the place was packed to capacity, and because we had gone to the cemetry for the burial, we were somewhat behind in the drinking lots of alcohol stakes!

While Marcus waited at the bar to be served, Scary Mary ( marcus' ex wife) came up to me, now normally she hates my guts, and finds any opportunity to piss me off and she usually succeeds with flying colours! she says to me it's about time we became friends and she is sorry for all the hateful, and spiteful and downright nasty things she has said and done over the last 4 years.

I accepted her apology she the hugged me (?) at which point Marcus returned from the bar with our drinks.
As the afternoon turned to evening and everyone was nicely trollied, Scary Mary was all over my man! Saying loudly to him 'go on then tell me you dont still love me!' which she repeated over and over.
Silly cow.
I gained some sympathetic looks from other people so I just rolled my eyes and downed my chardonnay.

She continued to be all over him and I found myself chatting to someone I had known from the pub.
Marcus at one stage started to cry and asking for Bobby back, so unable to console him, Mary then went to his rescue!

I took this as my cue to leave and the chap I had been chatting to said he would walk me home.
We started out the door and only managed a few steps when Scary came running out asking me to do something about Marcus, I said I was going home so she chips in that he had asked her if they could get back together!
I told her to fill her fucking boots as I had had enough for one day, so I trotted off into the night hand in hand with a nice man who wanted to look after me!

I asked the nice man on the way home if he had ever had an affair, as he has been happily married for quite sometime. He said he hadn't so I asked him if he fancied having one, he smiled and said he could be persuaded! So we stopped for a nice snog in the park, under the stars and I felt I had not a care in the world!

What a bitch I am. Now I feel awful that I wanted to lead that poor guy astray. We got to my gate and I kissed him gently on the lips and thanked him for making me feel better.

Marcus came stumbling home just over an hour later, shouting the odds at me, I just told him to shut the fuck up and sleep, he then passed out in all his clothes and drooled on the pillow, yeuw!

The next day I gets a text from scary's best mate asking what had happened at the wake as Scary was covered in bruises, she was in a right state and threatening to call the police.

Marcus says she fell over, Scary think marcus hit her! Oh for fucks sake!

I don't think Marcus was capable of hitting anyone, he could hardly stand, let alone hit out!
I sometimes wonder what on earth I have got myself involved with!

Then yesterday I saw Scary in town and asked her if she was ok, and apparently, her and Marcus had gone outside for a ciggie at the wake, when according to her, he asks her for sex and starts grabbing her boobs (not really his style), she then thinks as she is trying to escape his grasp she falls and bangs her head on the concrete! (shame).
She tells me the police want to press charges but she doesnt want to upset him any further as his best friend just died, and it weren't fair on his girlfriend!

I say pull the other one you stupid bitch, you have no witnesses and it was more than likely having watched you pawing him earlier in the evening that he pushed you away in disgust, and was trying to escape. Lets face it love, you aint no oil painting and look at least 10 years older than your 51 years. (Meow)

I have decided that she is not right in the head, mind you nor is he, and really they deserve each other! But unfortunately he always chooses to come home to me, arent I the lucky girl?

As for having an affair? well lets just say I really dont need more stress and coplications in my life!